At Least As Safe (Introduction / Part 1)

At Least As Safe

The young, eager couple sat across from me in my living room. The woman, her straight blond hair parted in the middle, was noticeably pregnant. Excited, a little nervous, they asked questions about me: Where had I gone to school? How many births had I attended? What kinds of medical equipment did I have, and what kinds of birth experiences could I support?

I answered them reassuringly, in the practiced style of a seasoned salesperson. My father had sold many products in his time: fancy windows, expensive decks, elaborate log homes. I inherited my power of persuasion from him. I told the couple about my schooling, my experience, and my philosophy of care. Yes, I was well-trained in water birth; yes, they could refuse any shots for their newborn. I knew the answers they wanted to hear, and I was happy to deliver all the right ones. There seemed little doubt that they would agree: I would be their midwife and manage their birth at the out-of-hospital birth center I co-owned.

One question, tacked on at the end, caught me only a little off-guard. The woman hesitated a little and asked, “And… this is, um, safe… right?”

I breathed deep, and replied with the most honest answer I knew to give: “It’s as safe as life gets. Nothing is risk-free. Driving down the highway to get here was not risk-free. Many studies have shown that birth outside of the hospital is at least as safe as birth in the hospital for low-risk women like you. And I’m very conservative. I won’t hesitate to take you to the hospital if I get concerned about anyone’s safety.” Yes, I was prepared to handle any and every eventuality.

I was hired. It was 2009, and I was on the cusp of a very successful stint as a birth center owner and licensed midwife, credentialed by the state of South Carolina. It would be years before I would truly confront the underlying deception of the answer I gave that day.